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Radical Acceptance: The Secret to Happy, Lasting Love, by Andrea Miller
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Review
"If you're at the end of your relationship rope, reach for Radical Acceptance: a thinky, shrinky, five-step guide to loving by embracing, as Miller's written, 'the darkness, the murkiness, the shadows of a relationship and the people in it.'" (Elle)"Despite its anti-romantic thesis — that finding and keeping love is hard work and takes practice — Radical Acceptance is a positive and practical self-help book." (Los Angeles Review of Books)"Full of touching stories, illuminating research, and sage wisdom, Miller’s book is an original take on love – that fully loving someone is not just good for them, it is good for us." (Psych Central)“This bold, insightful book is the most unequivocal challenge to love unconditionally that we have ever read. Radical Acceptance is just what the world needs now. We highly recommend it!” (Harville Hendrix, PhD, and Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD, bestselling authors of Making Marriage Simple and Getting the Love You Want)“A warm, honest approach to prioritizing your partner and creating true happiness in your relationship--and in yourself. Andrea is like the friend everyone needs in not only the tough moments, but the good ones too. A compelling book.” (John Gray, PhD, New York Times bestselling author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus)"Miller has written a fascinating, original, and highly courageous book on that issue dear to all of us—the eternal drive of partners to build and sustain a happy and fulfilling relationship. It’s full of poignant stories, smart advice, and good science. And it’s a great read." (Helen Fisher, PhD, biological anthropologist, bestselling author of Why We Love)“A wonderful new book. Relatable and emotional, Andrea Miller divulges her own and others’ marriage and dating stories that have benefited from learning how to practice Radical Acceptance.” (Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, clinician, teacher & author of Wired for Love)“In this important book, Andrea Miller succeeds in making us feel like we are having the most life-changing talk with our BFF. Jam-packed with wisdom for the ages, it compassionately pushes us to reclaim more from ourselves and our relationships.” (Pat Love, EdD, therapist, bestselling author of The Truth About Love)"By embracing the enlightening concept of Radical Acceptance, couples can far more easily make the leap from silent desperation to loving interconnection." (Ian Kerner, PhD LMFT, bestselling author of She Comes First)"Perhaps no one is better qualified than Andrea to simplify the secret to love and intimacy. She brings together the wisdom of YourTango's amazing experts and the millions of visitors and their experiences. A beautiful work." (David Bell, chairman emeritus of the Interpublic Group)
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About the Author
Andrea Miller is the founder and CEO of YourTango. She earned an engineering degree from Tulane University and a MBA from Columbia Business School. She lives in Manhattan with her husband and children.
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Product details
Paperback: 320 pages
Publisher: Atria Books; Reprint edition (May 15, 2018)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1501139215
ISBN-13: 978-1501139215
Product Dimensions:
5.5 x 0.9 x 8.4 inches
Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.7 out of 5 stars
50 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#96,958 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
If you're stuck in a space of uncertainty about whether or not to leave your current relationship, this is the book to help you make that decision. It digs into the mess and helps you sort out what 'radical acceptance' in a relationship requires (and really drives the point home that if you're not willing to fully accept your partner as he/she is, then you need to walk away) and how to embrace it even when that feels scary and vulnerable.Was really glad to see the author make the clear point that 'radical acceptance' is NOT about putting up with abuse or mistreatment. In fact, sometimes radical acceptance means recognizing that your partner IS an abuser and will not change, so ending the relationship is absolutely the right choice.What struck me the most is how essential radically accepting YOURSELF is to achieving the same with your partner. The author says that often we treat our partners with the same judgement we harm ourselves with. When I reflected on that, I had to admit, the last few fights with my husband involved me being super mad about things he was doing that, in truth, I was 100% doing as well.While happy couples can definitely benefit from this book, I think couples who feel stuck, half-in/half-out of the relationship, will benefit most. It really does help bring powerful clarity. Don't walk away from your relationship until you read this book!!
I read a lot of self-help books. I think in part to work on my own issues, but also, because I'm searching for the gems that are straightforward and clear about how to live a good life. My general feedback on most books is they're either too nuanced or too difficult to put into practice. Not this book. This book boils down the best advice that's out there into a simple message that's clear about how to live (and love) well. Andrea says somewhere in the book to just "love" the people in your life instead of trying to change them and THAT is the best advice.People don't change. You change. I change. But we can't make anyone do anything as much as we wish and pray that we could. If you're looking for a book at really tells you the truth, this is it. Her thoughts are backed up by some of the best writers in the field: Stan Tatkin, John Gray, Harville Hendrix... Helen Fisher. These are really big names who support Andrea's mission and as a reader, I've come to realize that it's a mission I share.I really do just want to love the people in my life. By learning how to radically accept them (yucky parts and all) I feel like I've gone a long way to healing my past and creating the life I most want to live. Thank you Andrea, from my heart. Your book truly is a gem.
For anyone who is looking for not just happiness, but deeper meaning and understanding in their relationships, this book carefully and beautifully helps one open their mind to a new perspective. Captivatingly written, Radical Acceptance is thought provoking and inclusive of so many different relationship scenarios. After reading it, one can easily apply the lessons learned not just in one's most important relationships, but in many different situations. Andrea Miller is wise and encouraging without being patronizing or self important. She is extremely relatable and has made Radical Acceptance a pleasure to read.
Truly a life changing book. I highly recommend everyone read this book, regardless of relationship status. Beautifully written, full of facts, and easy to comprehend. The author opens up and shares her experience in a relatable way. I recommended this to my ex husband, who couldn’t put it down. It allowed us both to talk about what went wrong, what we could have done differently, and how we could set ourselves up for success in our next relationships.Will be rereading frequently
I really enjoyed her message.The first chapter or two sum it up...love the person for who they are and don't try to change them.Simply explained with her examples that nail the message home.She has a lot of great information in the book, which I see from many other authors (and she cites many of the ideas). By the end of the book, it was getting a smidge tiresome and overwhelming. But hey, more techniques/advice are always good. Particularly when referencing back to the book.It isn't making my list of favorite marriage/relationship books...but it is rather good for the holistic sense.
Andrea Miller speaks to looking at love in a way many of us hadn't before. She is very clear about what is means to radically accept the one you love but most importantly, to radically accept you.I love the mix of expertise contributing to this book from thought leaders, researchers and others who have now implemented radical acceptance into their life.If you want to understand the core of love in a new and life changing way, get this book!Lori P
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